Twas the Week Before Christmas
by Adam Hopler
‘Twas the week before Christmas, when all thro’ the office,
Not a client was stirring, not even a prospect;
The ads were all posted by Google with care,
In hopes that some revenue soon would be there;
Employees were nestled all snug in their chairs,
While visions of bonus checks caught boss unawares.
My partner in suit, and I in my slacks,
Had just settled our brains for a long winter’s nap—
When at the front door there arose such a clatter,
I sprang from my desk to see what was a matter.
When, what to my wondering eyes should appear,
But Matt Yablunosky, and eight tiny reindeer?
Well, that just made no sense to me,
Oh wait, those are pink slips in reindeer origami!
Faster than Chris Rock his stories they came,
And he whistled, and shouted, and call’d them by name:
“From Darin! From Danvers! From Laird and Brandon,
“From Carver! From Karyl! And some guy named Camden!;
“With high circles run round that thermometer on all,
“Now dash away! Dash away! I told them you’d call!”
A wink of his eye and a twist of his head
Soon gave me to know I had nothing to dread.
He spoke no more words, but went straight to his work,
And I was left standing there, feeling like a jerk,
“But Matt!” I said, “you seem so Merry,
I’ve no referrals for you, just a bowl of cherry!”
And laying his finger aside of his nose,
“Aw buddy, come on, you ought’a know,
‘Giver’s Gain,’ that’s the motto, it gives us our might
And then I heard him exclaim, ere he drove out of sight—
Merry Christmas to all, and to all a good night.”
Adapted from Clement Clarke Moore ‘s A Visit from St. Nicholas